Even the most self-assured people have their moments, when it comes to self-confidence. It’s healthy to take an occasional introspective check however if you find that you’re regularly questioning yourself and your abilities then it’s time to give yourself a break.
Often we are our own biggest critic and our own biggest bully. Take time to learn to nurture your sense of self and learn to appreciate your positive qualities. There are so many more than you give yourself credit for.
Appreciate your strengths. And play to them. If you spend a lot of time trying to do things that you’re not good at or don’t understand then your confidence will take a blow. If you can delegate or outsource specific tasks that really aren’t your interest or forte, then do. Your self-confidence will thank you for it.
Be the part. The power of body language is immense. Open yourself up, hold your head high, pull your shoulders back, stand tall, make eye contact, give a firm handshake and smile! If you’re physically exuding confidence then your brain and the way you feel mentally will follow suit. Tony Robbins states, “If you change your physiology you will change your state”, and I couldn’t agree more. Just try now putting a smile on your face and see how much better you instantly feel!
Make friends with your inner critic. Rather than engaging with your inner voice as it puts you down, acknowledge that it is there. Thank it for showing up because you know it is there to try and keep you safe and in your comfort zone, but politely let it know that you don’t need it right now so it’s welcome to hang around in the wings if it really doesn’t want to leave, but it must be quiet and let you get on with your task and indeed your life. When we fight with our inner critic we only make it stronger, so accepting it takes away its power and gives you back the control.
Cut the comparisons. There will always be people who seem better off, happier, slimmer, richer, smarter, funnier, fitter etc. than you, so don’t let comparing yourself to others be a barrier to your own enjoyment and confidence levels. Remember, people only allow us to see what they want us to see and we never truly know what’s actually going on behind closed doors, so I urge you to simply notice what other people are doing rather than judge (both the good and the bad). Focus on how far you have come and how much you have achieved, then think about where you want to be and how you will get yourself there.
Rethink failure. If you can take some positives and learnings from a time when things appear to go wrong, then you will grow your confidence exponentially rather than being crippled by the errors of your past, which could otherwise prevent you from achieving your full potential. Often outcomes that are different from our original intentions can lead us on a different path to new and even more appropriate life adventure and achievement!
Celebrate. It’s imperative that you acknowledge and celebrate your wins, big and small. Now I’m not saying you have to pop open the champagne and shout from the hill tops every time something good happens, but patting yourself on the back and taking time to tell yourself you did good will naturally make you feel great and positively reinforce you to want to do the same thing again and even step it up a level…hello self confidence!